I think that all political theory will be replaced with the Pointy Stick theory, which states that “stay away from my food or I’ll stab you with this pointy stick.”

Concurrent.

This is what happens when Purple Prose and Word Salad fuck and have a baby.

I’ll take 7 for sure. Now it’s time to consider “what defines a container?”

Alternatively 2 or 3 depending on how the gravel is delivered and/or if I can chain teleport.

How dare you demand that We pay for your trinkets! Guards! Arrest this peasant!

I was unaware that people 9,000 years ago had such long torsos. Neat.

I also have two rules.

1. Flattery will get you nowhere.

2. I will accept bribes of cash or pizza.

Oh he didn’t invent the thing and he’s certainly not unique using it. This is like being mad at just one specific bird for pooping on your car.

This is cool and all but I can’t help but wonder why they went to the trouble to get them a squishy chair, of all things. Everywhere I’ve ever came to be just use whatever chairs were sitting around no matter the circumstances. Weird.

Pfft, you’ll take way more than that measly slice before I need the fruit-flavored chalk.

IIRC Saturday Night Live did a pretty funny sketch to wink and nod about it.

Wow. Can you imagine living in a country that punishes police brutality? I’m so goddamn jealous.

By calling 911.

But you can only ever play once.

Well I mean that’s why you read it, but you’re not wrong.

I think it’s a tie.

A wizard with a gun riding an undead dinosaur is the most '80s shit ever and I love it.

I’ve literally met people from Ecuador who thought Chicago was a crime infested hell hole because they watch gangster movies lol. If you don’t know where Chicago is then you’ve probably never seen a TV before either.

I’d like to make a collect call.