For the love of God, Anakin!

Mountain Goats are always a good choice.

I wanted to train my kids to do this, but my spouse rolled their eyes and asked, “Why would we willingly give up a weapon for you to have a last stand?”

They were young and zombie movies were everywhere. In the way of all children, the questions were non-stop. This was also the time I was bedridden, so I convinced them that zombies only went after healthy people.

I have trained my children from a young age that, in case of zombie outbreak or alien invasion, I am to be left behind. I require far too many medications to function in a post-apocalyptic setting.

Identical to OP.